Pug

Any lazy bums out there looking to get a job just lying around and doing nothing? Well, why not work for NASA? The National Aeronautics and Space Administration is offering $18,000 for volunteers looking to spend 70 days on their beds and not doing much else.

Don’t expect total comfort though. The bed will not sit up and will keep volunteers horizontally locked at a 6 degree slant. The study is aimed at finding ways to rehabilitate astronauts returning from space, and NASA believes the lack of energy used when in the zero gravity elements of outer space can be replicated by staying in bed for an extremely extended amount of time.

Two options include a 105 day option, which will include the 70 days with exercise and the following rehabilitation, and a 97 day program where no exercise will be given at all for the entire period of bed rest. Participants will be paid $1,200 a week until physical rehabilitation is finished.

Sounds like a dream come true at first glance, but on second thought I would have to pass. I like the ability to walk, run, smell the fine clean fall air, and go to the bathroom properly. Not to mention, staying on your back for two and a half months just sounds downright dangerous, despite the Institutional Review Board of the University of Texas Medical Branch stating otherwise.

I have a lot of gaming to catch up on, books to finally knock off my check list, and some writing projects in mind, but how can one enjoy their hobbies and not succumb to boredom by being stuck in such a comfortable position all day?

Not to mention possible loss of bone density, muscle tissue and respiratory functions? I’m too much of a hypochondriac to even think of that.

Those interested in pulling in half a year’s salary for two to three months of “work” can apply at NASA’s Official Webpage. NASA will only take non-smokers and those who can pass a Modified Air Force Class III physical.