Humans have pursued immortality for thousands of years, whether through meditation, exercise or advancements in medicine. But sometimes you just have to accept that, yes, you’re going to die.

Nobody likes to think of their time here on Earth as fleeting, so one company, Phoenix Biogenic, has apparently come up with a groundbreaking procedure that just might let you live on forever.

The company sent me a small package Tuesday morning, which included a small Android phone and a letter from someone named Albright.

It reads, in part:

Mr. Russell

Do you feel immortal? The life you leave behind will be your legacy, but the future is now. The fate of a healthy mind is no longer determined by the fate of a failing body.

Consciousness transfer is an exclusive endeavor. You are one of 200 individuals that have been pre-selected to experience a revolutionary singularity.

Your wardrobe, your car and your home are all custom designed by the world’s finest craftsmen. Your new body will be as well: genetically engineered for perfection and harvested to maturity. Looks, athleticism, every detail of your new anatomy—all designed to ofer you the very best of the human experience.

I’m already feeling inadequate.

The phone itself, once activated, pointed to Phoenix Biogenic’s website, which teases the procedure for a better you. You’ll look different, sound different—but you’ll still be you. Just, you know, a perfect human specimen according to societal conventions. Basically you’ll be Nic Cage.

There are a number of “vessels” outlined on the company’s site. Want to be an athletic 24-year-old male? Done. Or what about a slender 28-year-old woman? These options, and many more, are at your disposal, genetically engineered to be the perfect you. Don’t let age stop you from living on—simply transfer your consciousness to someone else.

“It doesn’t have to end…” Phoenix Biogenic’s website says.

If you had the chance, would you seize the opportunity to continue living on when your body fails? Think of it as transferring an OS to a new computer when the hardware components crap out.

Since I’d never heard of Phoenix Biogenic, I did some digging, and came to the conclusion that the website has been set up to tease a new film, Self/less, that’s being directed by Tarsem Singh. Here’s the synopsis, according to IMDB:

An extremely wealthy man (Ben Kingsley), dying from cancer, undergoes a radical medical procedure that transfers his consciousness into the body of a healthy young man (Ryan Reynolds). But all is not as it seems when he starts to uncover the mystery of the body’s origin and the organization that will kill to protect its cause.

Phoenix Biogenic is obviously the company that performs the procedure, though who this Albright character is remains a mystery. Has Albright set up an underground human harvesting ring for the purpose of these medical procedures? (That to me sounds a lot like Michael Bay’s The Island.)

I’m not sure, but I’ll supposedly find out more tomorrow, according to Albright’s instructions.

“Your old life is over,” the letter reads. “Welcome to your future.”

Dibs on transferring my consciousness to Taylor Lautner.