Google Glass is neat technology to look at and admire. But since being unleashed to explorer crowds, the wearable tech has quickly become a kind of social faux pas, something to be mocked instead of revered. There’s even a particularly unflattering term, “Glasshole,” used to describe Glass’s most fanatic and obnoxious wearers. So in an effort to ensure Glass is painted in the most positive light, the search giant this week released a “Do’s and Don’ts” guide to its legions of cyborg followers.
“Don’t: Be creepy or rude,” the guide counsels. Solid advice every human with a brain should follow, but especially important for people who are incapable of functioning without a face computer. The guide says, “Breaking the rules or being rude will not get businesses excited about Glass and will ruin it for other Explorers.” The underlying subtext here is that you paid $1,500 to be an ambassador for prototype technology, so you better behave accordingly.
Don’t do things like “Glass-out,” which is described as “staring off into the prism for long periods of time.” That suggestion sounds more like how to tell if you need an intervention or not. Actually, maybe you do, according to the next suggestion.
Don’t wear it and expect to be ignored. If you’re worried about someone interrupting that romantic dinner at a nice restaurant with a question about Glass, just take it off and put it around the back of your neck or in your bag.
I can’t tell if these are meant to be funny. The words ‘romantic’ and ‘Glass’ should never be uttered in the same sentence. Unless you’re Joaquin Phoenix from Her, going on a date with your significant other shouldn’t involve wearing Glass on your face. Leave it at home. Make a connection. And never put it around the back of your neck.
This advice actually comes from current Glass Explorers, who have seemingly collected some techno “wisdom” only those with face computers would acquire. Many of the Do’s involve simply being courteous about the technology and practicing common sense. But if you posses none of the courtesies for existing like a normal human, and think the world revolves around only Glass wearers, you need to stop being a “Glasshole.” It could get you arrested.